Rubber (2010)

I DARE YOU to watch this film. I fuckin' double dog dare you. I dare you to watch this movie after watching any of the Transformers movies. Your brain will literally cave in on itself...just crumble like an aging star degenerating into a black hole. After watching something so mind-numbingly STUPID and then to watch this film, an absurdist MASTERPIECE, your brain will shit its pants.

Here's the premise (are you ready?): A killer TIRE named Robert with psychic abilities goes on a killing spree and chases after a girl it's fallen in love with...that's right...a tire...

It sounds like a cheesy horror movie, but it's not. It's a SMART movie. It's aware of how absurd it is and revels in it. The very first thing that happens in the movie is a car appears on a desert road and begins knocking over random chairs that are set up and then a cop gets out OF THE TRUNK and then breaks the 4th wall to address us directly, informing us of the element of NO REASON in popular movies. Anytime you question something that happens in this movie, the answer is NO REASON.

For example, why is the tire watching step aerobics? NO REASON!

Just to give you a taste of how absurd this movie gets, here's a list of things the tire does:

- Blows up a dude's head with his psychic powers after the dude sideswipes him with his car

- Watches a chick shower and stalks her

- Goes swimming

- Dreams about when he was a tire on an actual car

- Gets reincarnated as a tricycle after he's killed

Probably the strangest part of the movie is that the audience are characters in the movie. That's right. The people watching the movie are actually personified in the movie and actually get involved with the action after most of them are poisoned with a giant turkey (you'll want to stop watching at this point but keep going).

Here's the twist, though. NOTHING in this movie happens for NO REASON. This movie is actually a movie about movies, and, more specifically, about the audience and their relationship to movies. There's a reason the tricycle and his army of tires end up in Hollywood at the end. Watch it once to be entertained by the absurdity of it all. Watch it twice for some pretty intelligent commentary. Just go Netflix that shit this very instant!

Why It's Awesome: The killer in this movie is a tire...that's it. That seals the deal right there.

Best Conversation:

Cop: But this is real life, Chad. We've got a dead body over here.

Officer Chad: No. It's not real life. Look at you. You've got a stuffed toy alligator under your arm.

(Cop looks down to notice he suddenly does, in fact, have a stuffed toy alligator under his arm)

Cop (shrugging): So?