Once Bitten (1985)

This movie is pure 80s heroin. This movie is so 80s it'll make you perm your hair, break out your Walkman, and listen to some WHAM!

Besides the pure 80s awesomeness of this movie, its modern appeal is that it's one of Jim Carrey's first starring roles and he plays a virgin AND a vampire...not a typical combo but it's the 80s so ANYTHING GOES! This is your typical 80s low-budget comedy where a bunch of teenagers go on a quest to get laid (sound familiar?). Their quest takes a supernatural twist when they travel to Hollywood (where there's a woman walking a LION on a leash) and run into a hot female vampire who needs to drink the blood of virgins in order to stay young. Hilarity ensues.

Let's do the TOTALLY RADICAL 80S CHECKLIST:

1) Cheesy 80s theme song...CHECK! (Youtube Once Bitten...it's as good as jumping in a Delorean and traveling back to 1985. Everyone in the band, men and women, have hardcore mullets!)

2) Random, nonsensical dance scene where all the extras clear the dance floor and the main characters dance a perfectly choreographed dance number...CHECK! (I've included the Youtube video of the scene below. My favorite part is when Carrey plays his leg like a guitar!)

3) A heroin-thin hot chick with pancake-flat titties...CHECK!

4) Horny sidekicks who spout an endless supply of one-liners...CHECK! ("There's too much pressure about getting laid. It's like taking a driver's test for manhood.")

5) A total lack of black people in places there should obviously be black people...CHECK! (No blacks in Hollywood...hmm...)

6) Insensitive gay jokes that would never fly in today's PC world...CHECK! ("Fag attack! There's a bunch of fags in the shower!")

In addition to all the 80s awesomeness, this movie also serves as a great reminder of a time when Jim Carrey was actually funny. All his trademark moves are there: the T-rex walk, the orangutan walk, the De Niro impression, the reckless falling down, the crazy facials...they're all there to remind us of a magical time when movies like Fun with Dick and Jane and Yes Man never, ever existed. Watch it!

Why It's Radical: If nothing else, it kicks the shit out of Twilight. This one absolutely reeks of the 80s and it's fun to see Jim Carrey when he was still trying to be funny and succeeding.

Best Quote:

Jamie: This is horrible. This is the suckiest thing ever. The whole school thinks we're...GAY!
Russ: No one's going to think we're gay.
Jamie: This is it. We might as well move in together and buy his and his towels.