Some Kind of Wonderful (1987)

What's the best reason to make a movie? Answer: REVENGE!!!

John Hughes made this movie after the studio changed the ending to Pretty in Pink so Ginger Girl ended up with lame Andrew McCarthy instead of stalker, Duckie. So he wrote the EXACT same movie with a male protagonist (if you consider Eric Stoltz a male) instead and made sure it ended with the main character choosing to bang his loser friend. He even tried to get his favorite ginger, Molly Ringwald, to star in it, but she refused (and ended her career in the process).

In Pretty in Pink Version 2.0, Eric Stoltz goes back in time in a DeLorean and prevents his parents from ever meeting but then Steven Spielberg decides it's not really working out and replaces him with Michael J. Fox. Oh wait, that's what happened in real life.

In THIS movie, a kind-of-poor kid falls for Lea "I fucked a duck" Thompson and starts dating her despite the fact she's rich and popular and he's...I guess I don't really know what he was. His dad was a dick, but they don't seem that poor. Oh, but Eric's Keith does have a lesbian friend who is not-so-secretly in love with him. She wears boxers and has a dyke haircut, and she's also easily the best character in the movie.

Check out these nuggets of Lesbian Wisdom:

"It's better to swallow pride than blood."

"Don't go mistaking paradise for a pair of legs."

"You break his heart, I break your face."

You are wise, oh carpet muncher.

But here's the real question: Is Some Kind of Wonderful better than Pretty in Pink? Let's compare:

Eric Stoltz > Molly Ringwald

As protagonists go, the failed Marty McFly gets the slight edge over the Gingerbread Queen. She always looks like she's constipated.

Watts > Duckie

Watts is kind of hot...in a lesbian sort of way. Plus she has the best dialogue of either film. Duckie is creepy and weird and probably has a Molly Ringwald hair doll in his bedroom. Advantage: Watts.

Lea Thompson > Andrew McCarthy

As far as the rich asshole love interests go, Lea Thompson wins because she has boobs and Andrew McCarthy's character had as much personality as a Triscuit cracker.

James Spader > The Asshole Child Rapist in SKOW

Not even close here. James Spader is the ultimate rich asshole/rapist. The V in his button-down shirt runs deep, my friends.

So there you have it. Despite being less well-known and making less money, Some Kind of Wonderful is the superior movie...easily...by far. Unfortunately, Lea Thompson having sex with a duck > both movies combined x10. Now get your skag and let's go!

Why It's Awesome: It's Pretty in Pink...but better!

Best Quote:

Keith (talking about Amanda Jones): You can't judge a book by its cover.
Watts: No, but you can tell how much it's gonna cost.