Little Miss Sunshine (2006)

I figured I'd end this month's millennial comedy theme with a classy comedy. Classy comedies are pretty hard to find nowadays with most of the early 2000s being dominated by raunchy frat boy humor with plenty of sex and drugs and violence, but, amid the chaos of the Will Ferrells and Ben Stillers of the world, every now and then you'll find something that is pretty special.

Little Miss Sunshine definitely fits that description. Not only is it dark and quirky and well written and well acted...it's damn funny, too.

If you're not familiar with the plot, here it is in a nutshell: a quirky family who basically hate each other drive a busted VW bus from New Mexico to California for the Little Miss Sunshine beauty pageant. The members of the family include a suicidal and homosexual uncle (Steve Carrell in the best role he'll ever perform), an unsuccessful self-help guru father (the always reliable Greg Kinnear), a teenage boy who has taken a vow of silence as part of his obsession with the philosopher Nietzsche (the amazing Paul Dano), a heroin-addicted grandfather (the stupendous Alan Arkin), a little girl who is naturally cheerful and totally immune to her family's insanity (Abigail Breslin in a tiny fat suit), and the mother (the serviceable Toni Collette) who is just trying to keep her family together.

The cast is the reason this movie works. Wow. Steve Carrell actually acts in this one. You're not going to see his usual zany antics (he is supposed to be suicidal and depressed after all). Alan Arkin is always amazing and it's no different in this one as the drug-addicted, yet lovable grandfather (although there was a moment when I thought he was raping Abigail but I think that would have taken things to a dark place...).

The real breakout star of this flick, however, is the totally underrated Paul Dano. Anyone who has seen There Will Be Blood knows exactly what I'm talking about. Paul Dano is the new Daniel Day-Lewis. Try...TRY not to lose yourself in the moment when Dwayne realizes he's colorblind and he's not going to get to be a fighter jet pilot and finally breaks his vow of silence by TOTALLY TWEAKING THE FUCK OUT in a cinematic moment that Dano just absolutely acts the shit out of. Damn is he good!

There are certain movies, though, that are great because they contain a cinematic moment (think the diner scene in When Harry Met Sally). This movie contains one of those moments. Many movies build and build and build to that final scene and that scene totally and utterly fails to deliver the goods. LMS, however, contains one of the single greatest end scenes ever filmed by man. When the entire family storms the stage during the beauty pageant and starts dancing to Rick James's Superfreak I absolutely lost it. I had tears streaming down my face in the theater. It is a moment that is so hilarious, so sweet and touching, yet creative and fun that it easily cracks my top ten list of greatest scenes in cinema. I've included it below simply because it would be a crime not to.

Although I love the insanity and quotability of some of the zanier comedies of the New Millennium, Little Miss Sunshine is easily my favorite comedy of the decade. Plus it introduced me to Nietzsche so for that I am forever grateful.

Why It's Awesome: Few movies allow you to totally dislike the characters at the beginning of the film and absolutely love, not just a few or some of them, but all of them. Really that's just great writing. RESPECT!

Best Quote:

Dwayne: You know what? Fuck beauty contests. Life is one fucking beauty contest after another. School, then college, then work... Fuck that. And fuck the Air Force Academy. If I want to fly, I'll find a way to fly. You do what you love, and fuck the rest.

Step Brothers (2008)

I've decided this month is going to be Millennial Comedy Month - a month of comedies that accomplished something rare during the first decade of the new millennium...made me laugh at a movie.

Step Brothers is the last epically hilarious Will Ferrell comedy ever made. He should probably just die because I don't believe he has another movie like this in him. Give the man credit: he starred in three truly hilarious films during the decade with Anchorman, Talladega, and Step Brothers whereas the funniest man of the 90s (Sandler) only scored two actual funny films (Madison and Happy). And please don't try to argue with me about Sandler's merits as a comedian or I will fill a pillowcase full of bars of soap and beat the shit out of you.

Really, if you look at all three, there's a common thread: Adam McKay (director extraordinaire). McKay gets the best out of Ferrell whereas other directors can only get him to run around the screen looking like a curly-headed fuck...a completely unfunny curly-headed fuck. John C. Reilly is the perfect comedy sidekick in this and Talladega (and try not to piss yourself watching him in Walk Hard...totally underrated). Plus you've got some great supporting actors in Mary Steenburgen and Richard Jenkins, but the unsung hero of this film has to be Adam Scott, who plays an asshole of epic proportions (who lip syncs Vanilla Ice, no less).

This is how you make a comedy: create a funny premise (two man-children are forced to coexist when their parents marry) and fill the two leads with hilarious actors (Ferrell and Reilly). Boom! Let the hilarity ensue. But enough about things and stuff, these movies are about one thing...THE QUOTES.

Time for some EPIC STEP BROTHERS QUOTES:

Dale: Why do you have Randy Jackson's autograph on a martial arts weapon?
Brennan: 'Cause I bumped into him and all I had on me was this samurai sword...and you're not gonna NOT get Randy Jackson's autograph, right?

Brennan: I still hate you, but you got a pretty awesome collection of nudie mags.
Dale: Yeah, I got 'em from the 70s, 80s, and 90s. It's like masturbating in a time machine.

Dale: You and your mom are hillbillies. This is a house of learned doctors.

Dale: Dad, we're men. We like to shit with the door open, we talk about pussy, we go on riverboat gambling trips, and we make our own beef jerky. That's what we do, and now that is all wrecked.
Dr. Doback: We have literally never done any of those things.

Alice: I wanna roll you up into a little ball and shove you up my vagina.

Dale: Suppose Nancy sees me coming out of the shower and decides to come on to me. I'm looking good, got a luscious V of hair going through my chest pubes down to my ball fro. She takes one look at me and goes "Oh my God, I've had the old bull, now I want the young calf" and she grabs me by the wiener.

Brennan: I've got a belly full of white dog crap in me and now you lay this shit on me?!

On a final note, this movie reaches epic status for no other reason than it is the ONLY movie in history (Besides the truly horrific Children at Play) that shows adults beating up children. It's usually the other way around, but little kids are crap and I'm proud that McKay had the good sense to include two full grown men beating the piss out of a bunch of middle schoolers. If you have a problem with movies glorifying child abuse, do me a favor and just shut...shut your mouth...just shut your mouth for a second...

Why It's Awesome: Will Ferrell + John C. Reilly + Adam McKay + no real plot = EPIC WIN!

Best Quote (There's really only one thing left to say...):

BOATS AND HOES!

Super Troopers (2001)

A few years back, some fellow movie fanatics and I (known collectively as "The Finer Things Club") rated the best Millennial comedies of the late 90s and early 2000s. We were mixed on movies like Anchorman and Happy Gilmore and Austin Powers, but Super Troopers finished solidly in everyone's top ten, and, when the dust settled, even though it had failed to receive a single #1 ranking, Super Troopers was the best Millennial comedy OF ALL TIME...and you know what? I can't argue.

Meow, forget that this movie doesn't star an A-list comedian, this movie is fucking funny. Basically this movie is about what anyone would love to do if they were a cop: fuck around and mess with people. Who wouldn't love to freak out stoners, wear a bullet-proof cup, chug maple syrup, play repeater, or fondle some kinky German chick listening to techno music in a stolen car?

Meow, the true measure of a legendary comedy is how many of its quotes become ingrained in one's everyday vocabulary. That's right, folks, it's meow time for a SUPER TROOPER QUOTE-OFF!

"Give me a liter o' cola."

"It stinks like sex in here."

"Car Ram-Rod!"

"Okie silly dilly dokie-o. I'm an idiot."

"Enhance...enhance...enhance...enhance..."

"I swear to God I'm going to pistol whip the next guy who says Shenanigans."

"I just lost a buck...TO MYSELF!"

"Ooooooh, shit! I got you good, fucker!"

"Who wants a mustache ride?"

"You are freakin' out...man."

"The Snozzberries taste like Snozzberries!"

Holy piss, meow, those are all things I say on a daily basis, as I'm sure most of you do. I even ask people if they want a mustache ride despite the fact I have never had, nor am I capable of growing a mustache. It's just common courtesy really.

In conclusion, if you didn't laugh your ass off reading those quotes, then either you are totally lame or you need to watch this movie at least a dozen times while stoned off your ass. DO IT MEOW!

I'm sorry, are you saying meow?

Why It's Awesome: One of (if not THE) best and most quotable movie of the New Millennium. A great cast, hilarious physical comedy, clever dialogue, just enough plot to move from one joke to another, and a guy in a costume that makes it look like he's having sex with a bear. What more do you people want?!

Best Quote (maybe not the best but it finishes the running joke):

Am I saying meow? Do I look like a cat to you, boy? Am I jumping around all nimbly-bimbly from tree to tree? Am I drinking milke from a saucer? Am I eating mice? Meow I'm gonna have to give you a ticket on this one. No buts meow. It's the law.